Kathleen Kennedy

Pick your poison: Star Wars or Star Trek

You can either be a Star Wars fan or a Star Trek fan. You can’t be both.

Well, you can, but I’ve found that people are particular to one of the franchises and know little about the other.

I’m a Star Wars guy. I grew up in the 1980s and was the perfect age for the original trilogy. Yes, Star Trek was around, and I dug The Wrath of Khan. (Who can forget William Shatner screaming “Khan!”)

It’s not that I dislike Star Trek, widely regarded as the thinking-man’s Star Wars. I never got into it. I’m vaguely aware of some of the lore, and I can do the Vulcan greeting. I even interviewed George Takei many moons ago.

So, I’m in no position to scrutinize the franchise’s newest offering, Starfleet Academy. I’ll leave that to others, and it seems there are plenty of people willing to do it.

Many Star Trek fans, I’m talking die-hard Trekkies, dislike it because, according to reviews, the show deviates from classic Star Trek storytelling (usually more on the scientific end of sci-fi, as opposed to the swashbuckling Star Wars adventures). They may have a point.

From what little I know about Star Trek, I’m positive that the Klingons of old were stand-ins for warmongering communists. Everyone knows that.

Starfleet Academy’s Klingon, Kraag (above), doesn’t seek an honorable death in battle, it seems. He seeks to discover beauty in life and enjoys watching birds. There’s not one thing wrong with this. I just queried an agent who likes bird-watching. There is, however, a teensy problem with Klingon warriors grabbing a pair of binoculars and squealing, “Ooh! There’s a fluffy-backed tit-babbler!” (Yes, that’s a real bird.)

That’s tantamount to Jabba the Hutt of Star Wars fame declaring, “You know, I really need to shed 500 pounds, eat more fruit, be less judgmental, and stop dropping innocent people into the rancor pit to be devoured for my amusement.”

It goes against everything we know about Jabba the same way prioritizing the spotting of a blue-billed cockatoo makes no sense for Klingons who pray for war and destruction.

And it appears whoever’s in charge of Star Trek is making the same mistake that Star Wars did under Kathleen Kennedy’s stewardship. Rather than stick with what works (Star Trek: The Next Generation, and Deep Space Nine were wildly popular and adhered to the franchise’s sophisticated takes on political and social issues), Star Trek now cranks out sophomoric dialogue and cliched storytelling geared toward, well, I’m not sure. The younger crowd? If so, don’t treat them like they’re stupid or talk down to them. Assume the audience isn’t swarming with bigots who need lectures about modern sensibilities. Nothing turns off an audience faster.

But I’m not that audience. I haven’t watched anything Star Trek in decades. And I’ve watched fewer Star Wars shows over the years. Too much of something good eventually turns everything bad because of the pressure to keep producing quality. It runs out. Maybe that’s where Star Trek is at this point. I hope not.

Maybe Star Trek, and Star Wars, for that matter, simply need new writers.

End of a Star Wars Error …

Imagine purchasing one of the most profitable and beloved franchises in history, and then making every bad decision possible to ruin it.

That’s what Kathleen Kennedy when she was handed Star Wars after Disney purchased is more than a decade ago.

Mercifully, she’s leaving.

The Force Awakens, the fist new SW flick in a decade released in 2015, and it was fine for what it was (almost an exact replica of the original Star Wars). Then things slid downhill.

New (and uninteresting and uninspiring) characters were added. Beloved characters killed off. Millions of childhoods died in the process.

I liked The Mandolorian, and will see the movie involving him this year. But most of the other SW offerings (The Acolyte especially, but also Ahsoka, Obi-Wan, the Book of Boba Fett) lacked. Poor writing, unlikeable characters, and, frankly, too much of it doomed the franchise.

What always made Star Wars special to me was its rarity. Growing up in the 80s, we couldn’t wait for Return of the Jedi! It has been an eternity (3 years is an eternity to a 7-year-old) since Empire. And we got Jabba and all those creatures. It’s still my favorite for that reason.

Then 16 years passed to 1999 and The Phantom Menace. And it was bad. But bad Star Wars is like bad pizza. You’ll still eat it. George wasn’t at his best then, and the subsequent 2 films at least explained things leading to the beginning of A New Hope. We got some animated SW after that, but no more movies. Until the sale. Then awful movies and many cringe-worthy shows. We were saturated with Star Wars shows and movies not worthy of carrying that name.

It’s to the point where new SW shows arrive on Disney+ and I don’t bother watching. It’s not that it’s not the same as the original trilogy, it’s now mass-marketed junk. The original movies had groundbreaking special effects. Everything now is blue screen and motion capture. The magic’s gone.

Maybe Kennedy’s replacement will manage to right the ship, but it’s a tall order. Time will tell. And we’ll get our first glimpse this summer with the new Mandolorian movie.

Until then, the original trilogy’s on bluray and the magic’s still there.